Well Then

It's the month of the Sacred Heart, so I've been reading The Spiritual Direction of St. Claude de la Colombiere, spiritual director to St. Margaret Mary Alacocque. I'm attracted to a spiritual director who doesn't scruple to kick you in the pants.
The spirit of God inclines us to fervor, but this fervor is calm and causes no trouble either to ourselves or to others; when it meets with obstacles it knows how to stop and submit to God's will. Its only arms are patience and gentleness. You want to be a martyr; you have a daily martyrdom which you endure unwillingly and without resignation! I see nothing reasonable in such a desire and nothing which looks like an inspiration.
In another letter he writes to a religious:
I think you are somewhat slow and pusillanimous...
and then gives him a gentle but firm list of matters on which to examine his own conscience to see if it's so. Many topics come up, but the main thing the saint does is take away excuses. Distractions, sorrows, complaints of any kind...he's having none of it.
You say that if you could see me more often you would be better than you are. Perhaps you have not sufficiently considered that in your convent you have him from whom all grace comes, without whose help no one can help you, and who has no need of me or of anyone else to sanctify you. Think about this and say no more about it, because there is nothing to be said. It is only our want of confidence that prevents us from profiting by the presence of Jesus Christ, who does not remain with us in order to do nothing!

You think you would be less distracted if you were away from the circumstances in which God has placed you; I think, on the contrary, that you would have fewer distractions if you accepted things with more conformity to God's will....Think more of making good use of your crosses than of getting rid of them under pretext of having more liberty with which to serve God.
...avoid anxiety and discouragment at your faults; this comes merely from self-love, because you think more of yourself than of God.
He's never harsh, merely direct. He has much of value to say about friendship with Christ, which is more important than his somewhat blunt style. I highlight the latter because it seems extra-refreshing while we're in the middle of the Pander season, and because in the Self-Esteem Culture in which we're immersed, it's good to spend time with people who want to see their faults so as to conquer them, rather than pretend and be told they don't have any.