Three Dog Night

People are absurd. But funny. Behold the weirdest Amazon product reviews. Including:
Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.
Unfortunately I already had this exact picture tattooed on my chest, but this shirt is very useful in colder weather.

There are more than 500 reviews (some of them raunchy, be warned) claiming mystical powers for the shirt, and reviewing the shirt has become a phenomenon.

What shall we review ironically?

Curtsy: American Digest